drusillas_rain: (Angelina Jolie)
posted by [personal profile] drusillas_rain at 12:15pm on 10/03/2011
There have been a few posts about WIP's on my flist lately, some of which I commented on, others of which I just didn't know what to say.

See, I have a WIP that effectively became the reason I withdrew from HP fandom.

The background
I swore I would never ever post a WIP. I have binders and files of unfinished stories. I never participate in those "what's in your WIP folder" memes, because it would take way too long for me to list everything. I'm also a fairly slow writer. But then I came up with the idea for Drow - it was inspired by some art, and was only going to be a short one-shot, which then grew. I outlined it. I posted 3 times a week. And it totally worked.

Until I realized it was a trilogy.

The second part went pretty well - I wasn't posting as frequently, but with the outline, I was able to get through it.

Then came part 3, which is where it all fell apart.

It's all outlined. I still think about it at least once a week, even though it's been over 4 years since I last posted. At the time, I was going through a really rough time and as a result had really bad writer's block that last 2 years. When it finally cleared I wanted to write again, but Drow was there and I couldn't let myself write anything until it was done. Except, Drow still wasn't happening. So, I switched to original fiction. The occasional drabble. I've done 2 fests, that I never linked to my lj because it felt like a complete betrayal to the readers of Drow.

Betrayal?
The last chapter of Drow was posted in 2006 and I still get the occasional anon comment of "so, you gonna finish this or what?". It breaks my heart every time, because I hate when it happens to me as a reader. I've also distanced myself from HP fandom, which honestly makes me sad. I mean, I still participate in the online HP community, but in a "I care about your existence" kind of way. I've also embraced new fandoms.

Look, I know Drow isn't the best story in fandom. But it was the first story that I really let myself explore the kind of writing I wanted to do. I used to even discuss the plot points with a non-fandom friend over dinner and he was fascinated by the twists and turns, as were the readers.

So what now?
TLDR from above - wtf do I do now? How do I fix this?

Over the past year I've been working really hard on my output as a writer, both in fandom and original fiction. I wrote a holiday fest fic that's even been recced on [livejournal.com profile] crack_broom (so I guess it means it doesn't totally suck) that was over 10K. I'm working on submitting a 2nd original story to my RL critique group and that I hope to submit to a mentoring program for new writers. I'm blogging more in various places. But, I feel that if I ever want to move on and really be able to feel free to write, I need to finish Drow.

Your thoughts here
I want to finish Drow. I want to take the folder with all my notes in it which has lived on my desk since 2006 (even through a major renovation of my study) and do something with it.

But, how? Do I go back and re-edit what was posted and then re-post it chapter by chapter?
Do I just leave the chapters where they are and start posting it again section by section?
Or do I finish it and then just post it all in one big chunk on AO3?

Thoughts? Opinions? Rants? Hugs? All would be appreciated.

--

Ok, this is surprising. I actually feel lighter having written this all out. That kind of soul-bearing relief doesn't usually happen to me. But I want to make things right with the world and with fandom. Thanks for listening <3

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